OMG that site is awesome, SE! Thanks for the link! Dylan Moran is brilliant, Bernard's definately my favourite character
Skinhead: (to Manny) Oi, Hairy! What you looking at?
Manny: Have you ever noticed a calm person with a loud voice? Try and speak softly once in a while.
(Skinhead punches Manny in the face)
Manny: Add a dab of lavender to milk. Leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it.
Fran: So Manny, tell us all about yourself.
Manny: Well I was born in London...
Bernard: Stop right there, David Copperfield. If we're going back that far we'll need popcorn or something.
Fran: Don't mind him, Manny. Go ahead.
Manny: Well like I say, born in London, moved around quite a bit, saw a lot of army bases.
Fran: Oh, your father was in the army?
Manny: No, just coincidence.
Bernard: Sorry could we do this some other time when I'm not here?
Manny: Alright. Fair enough. You know, this could be a really lovely place.
Bernard: It is a lovely place!
Manny: Yeah you'd have to wax the shelves, and get rid of whatever it is that makes you stick to the floor over here.
Bernard: You're supposed to stick to the floor over there. I like it like that. Stops children running around.
Manny: And seal the floors, stop that rising smell, and you do know you've got molluscs on your pipes?
Bernard: What of it?
Manny: Well, it's just that traditionally they live in the sea. Put in a few standard lamps...
Bernard: Why didn't you just say you were gay?
Manny: What? But I, I'm not.
Bernard: But you're interested in lamps.
Manny: Yeah but I'm interested in, in women, and lamps. I thought you were actually (points to Bernard). Gay, I mean.
Bernard: So did I for a bit. Then I found out about the prohibitive standards of hygiene. And all that dancing!
Bernard: Old wine is good wine.
Manny: Yes. But expensive wine is good wine also.
Bernard: Yes. But the older the wine is, the gooder it is.
Manny: Ah but by the same token, the more expensive the wine, then the gooder it is also.
Bernard: (looking at the wine) Look at the colours.
Bernard: All the colours. Well... yellow.
Manny: This is like... a... a farmyard... of wine.
Bernard: It's like looking into the eye of a duck.
Manny: And sucking all the fluid from its beak.
LOL! Sorry, this is turning into Black Books quote-o-rama... but I can't help it! I love this show! ;D;D